In an acid test of his resolve to simplify his life, he put his latest thought experiment into action. He quit his part-time job as a pet sitter, donned a hazmat suit and dropped off Schrödinger’s cat at the nearest animal shelter. Whether the test animal was dead or alive, or somewhere in between, Murphy could not have said and nobody asked.
While he was there, the furry face of one of the four-legged tenants rang a bell. Pavlov’s dog was glad to see him and Murphy, harking back to his days as an undergrad lab assistant, wiped the saliva off of the mutt’s muzzle before leaving the facility.
To loose himself from the bonds of matrimony Murphy used Occam’s razor to cut the Gordian knot of an otherwise binding prenuptial agreement and terminate his quantum entanglement with Mrs. Murphy. That would show her who had the super position in their relationship.
At his regular workplace, Murphy employed the sword of Damocles to split hairs with the company’s lawyers and somehow managed to get himself released from a long-term employment contract.
The outcome of his Machiavellian machinations, however, was not at all what he’d hoped for, and instead of being footloose and fancy free, his life was more complicated than ever.
In his haste to complete the simplification process, he’d forgotten all about Murphy’s Law: anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.
For starters, the cat came back.
AUTHOR BIO: John H. Dromey was born in northeast Missouri. He’s had flash fiction in two previous issues of Liquid Imagination (Issues 10 and 11). In addition, he’s had short fiction published in Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine, Gumshoe Review, Plasma Frequency Magazine, and elsewhere, as well as in a number of anthologies.